Guess she could have used a little more training and experience?

Highbrow Yet Despicable

You may think you know someone. But every now and again they act in a way that shows their true colors. And sometimes those colors are horrifying.

There was finally some good news for the recently unlucky van der Woodsen family. CeCe’s will had been invalidated after her nurse came forward to say that Ivy had tricked the poor, sick woman. Now the estate would be split 50/50 between Lily and Carol. You know, actual members of CeCe’s family. Ivy was shocked by the nurse’s accusations. She did nothing but take care of CeCe. The nurse lied. How much had Lily paid her? But Lily didn’t care about her phony niece’s claims. See ya later, Ivy Dickens. Forever.

In order to clear the air about all the recent allegations of the family bickering over money, Lily decided to throw a dinner party and invite a reporter. Serena thought there were two people she should invite: her father and Lola. So Serena went in search of her cousin. But first she called her dad to tell him about the party. Sadly for her, William said he was out of town. Rain check! But what would you know. Serena just so happened to walk by Lola having breaking with, dun dun dun, William van der Woodsen! Whaaat? Unbeknownst to Serena, William had just revealed to Lola that he wasn’t just her ex-uncle but he was also, ready for it? William in Darth Vader voice: Lola. I am your father. William wanted a relationship with his daughter. He was a lousy dad to Serena and Eric and now he’d learned from his mistakes. They should focus on the future. Although how about they keep this jaw dropping news to themselves for now.

Later on, Serena confronted her dad at his hotel. She could not believe her father had lied to her about being in NY. And hanging out with Lola? WTF, dad? S confronted him about it. He fibbed and said he had just so happened to bond with his niece. But to make it up to S, he’d be happy to attend the dinner that night. Score! Now Serena just needed to find Lola to invite her. So she went to The Spectator. Nate told Serena she’d just missed her cousin. Lola had come earlier to see Nate to apologize for outing Diana as Chuck’s mother. She felt terrible. Especially after she recently had learned who her own father was. Since Nate’s lips are beyond loose (DON’T TELL HIM ANYTHING!), he informed Serena that Lola was with her father just that morning. Serena put two and two together and WTH, Lola was not just her cousin but her sister too? OMFG!

Of course, Serena went right to her mom and told her to cancel the dinner. William had an affair with Carol when he was still married to Lily. Lola was her sister. It all made sense now. The reason why Carol hid her daughter all these years, why she hired Ivy. Lily was surprisingly stoic. She told Serena they needed to handle their present problems before they dealt with past issues. It would be a good idea for them to keep quiet about it all until after the reporter left. Then they could calmly sort if out. Phew. However, Lily did call someone about a partnership. And who was that someone? You’re never going to guess it: Ivy!

When Nate wasn’t being the world’s worst secret keeper, he was dealing with Diana. She wanted to work in peace with him. Although it was kind of hard because she totally still had feelings for him. Nate was all “ummm, you’re Chuck’s mom. That’s weird!” Perhaps it was time to just close the door on Diana and put her out of business with him. Since Nate’s grandfather wasn’t bankrolling her that meant someone else had to be. So N turned to our resident PI Andrew Tyler. Tyler found out that Diana was getting funding from an Australian holding company. And one of the board members there was Jack Bass! Whoa!

Nate was determined to get to the bottom of the whole Jack/Diana connection. Andrew Tyler said the first record of Diana Payne was three years ago. Wait, hold up. What’s her real name then? So Nate got let into Diana’s hotel room and started snooping around. He found her planner. But before Nate could snatch it, Diana came in. What was he doing there? Nate said Diana was right all along. Their chemistry’s undeniable. And with that they started kissing, which led to you know what. Afterwards when Diana went to the bathroom, Nate jumped out of bed, grabbed the planner and got the heck out of there. Screw and run!

All the while, an issue of New York Magazine had come out featuring both Blair and Dan in the approval matrix. The only thing was that while Dan was considered highbrow/brilliant for writing a new book that wasn’t a cheap sequel to Inside, Blair was listed under lowbrow/brilliant for being married for less time than Kim Kardashian Ouch! B was obviously upset by this and thus set out to be just as highbrow as Dan!

Dan was one of the five nominees for the New York Public Library Young Lions Fiction Award. Naturally, Blair would be his date. She decided that this would be the perfect opportunity to showcase her true approval matrix rating: highbrow/despicable. After all, that was where all the true tastemakers and headliners were. What she had to do was do something magnanimous while also stealing Dan’s thunder. Uh oh.

When Dan went up to make his speech, Blair totally interrupted him to announce her plans to provide an endowment to the Young Lions foundation. People were shocked. Bravo, Blair. Because it truly was way despicable. Dan could not believe B would do such a thing. And he knew it was all because of the approval matrix. Who even cares about that? Blair confessed that she didn’t want to live in someone else’s shadow. That’s all she’s ever done in her past relationships. But Dan didn’t think that was the case. He thought they were equals. Perhaps Blair was too obsessed with how everyone else perceived her that she couldn’t see her true self. Amen!

Later that night, Blair admitted that Dan was right. The problem wasn’t his success. It was her own. She had lost her true self. But she wanted to be found. Maybe Dan could help? Aww.

At Lily’s dinner, the whole family showed up. Well, the whole family minus Rufus. He was still living in Brooklyn and she on the UES. Rufus thought they were supposed to be in a partnership but Lily didn’t seem like she wanted to be an equal partner. Lily had initially invited him to dinner to make amends. But then for some reason, she lied and told Rufus it had been canceled. Hmm. Anyway, the whole family and the reporter from NY Social Diary all sat around the dinner table. They were eating family style. Serena remarked that was sooo unlike her mother. Family style’s like so suburban. But Lily said in this family they love to share. You know, like how Carol stole her husband and decided to have his baby behind her back. Whoa! Thought Lily was going to sort if out calmly. Guess not! And right then and there, cops came out to arrest Carol for fraud. Carol pleaded with them she hadn’t committed the crime. It was Ivy! Too bad for Carol, because Lily now had Ivy on her side. Turned out, Ivy had given her statement in exchange for ratting out Carol. Ivy was going to get off scratch free. Carol? Not so much.

Lola was beyond upset about her mom’s arrest. And who was there to comfort her? Why daddy dearest, of course. Serena was livid. William was being so nice to Lola. All Serena wanted her whole life was a dad who cared about her. And now the minute William found out he was the father to someone else, he rushed to her side to play the part of dad. William had already broke her mom’s heart and now he’d broken Serena’s as well. Eek.

Rufus came to the UES apartment. He saw the news report about what went on at dinner. A dinner he was told was canceled. Busted, Lily! But she wasn’t apologizing. She said Carol needed to be punished. Rufus had a suspicion that Lily had paid off that nurse to lie in court. If this was the kind of person Lily wanted to be, Rufus didn’t want anything to do with it. Then Lily said the meanest thing ever to him: Where was Rufus going to find a rich UES woman who took care of him like she did? That must’ve stung. Rufus said they should spend time apart. Thought these 2 were perfect!!

At the jail, Carol signed over power of attorney to William who promised he’d make sure Lola was taken care of. But little did Carol know that William was in on the whole thing with Lily. Lily was the one who made William get Carol to sign. I mean, it was the least he could do after she found out about the lovechild. William wanted Lily’s word that she’d help out Lola. Lily said she wasn’t a monster. Of course, she’d help her out. Hmmm, not sure I’m buying it. And with that, William decided to leave New York. He had caused enough damage.

Lily paid Ivy (1 million dollars!!) for ratting on Carol. But Ivy really didn’t want the money. What she wanted was to be a part of the family once again. Could she please try to earn back a place in Lily’s heart? Lily was all “hell no!” Bye, Ivy. For real. And what do you know, Ivy ripped up the check. Girl, you crazy!

Now that they weren’t just cousins but sisters as well, Lola went to see Serena. Sadly for Lola, S wanted nothing to do with her. Stay away from their family. Yikes. But before Lola left she saw a piece of paper with the server name and address for Gossip Girl. Lola pocketed it. OMG what’s she gonna do with that??

And finally, after some time debating it, Chuck decided that he wanted a relationship with Diana now that he knew she was his mother. That’s cute. But then Nate received a picture from Elizabeth Fisher. It was a picture of her pregnant. With Chuck. Huh? So she was his mom after all? Nate assumed Jack paid Diana to lie. Yet why would Elizabeth deny being the blood donor? None of this made any sense. Then they realized it. The one common thread was Jack Bass. In the picture of preggers Elizabeth, a guy with a tattoo was cut out of it. Jack has the same exact tattoo. And that’s when Chuck realized something. What if the big question wasn’t who’s his mom but rather who’s his dad? OMG could it be? Was Jack Bass Chuck’s actual dad? AHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Family! Can’t live with them, can’t live without them. Often times they disappoint you. But just remember: blood is thicker than water. 

                                                                                                                                        Xoxo Gossip Girl

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All About Lola

Lola was having the best week ever! The press from the Kiki de Montparnasse fashion show was doing wonders for her “it girl” status. As well as for her career. Not only were people emailing Gossip Girl (aka Serena) asking for more info about Lola, but the budding actress also got an audition for famed director Lars von Trier’s staging of Dancer in the Dark at The Public. Lola turned to her cousin for sartorial advice. What should she wear to the audition?? Serena helped her cousin out. But not without a few biting words. It seemed like everyone was writing about Lola. Everyone except Gossip Girl. Lola didn’t seem to care. Gossip Girl was pathetic and irrelevant. This caught Serena a bit off guard. S asked her cousin if she was nervous for the audition. Lola said that while directors wielded a little too much power and Lars might be tough, she’d be able to hold back the tears and stay strong. You go, girl!

When Lola got to her audition she was surprised to learn it had been canceled. Huh? Turned out a GG blast had gone out about Lola being a diva. She had been overheard bragging that real actors don’t need directors. Um, way harsh, S! Lola could not believe this. She went to see her cousin. It didn’t make any sense. Gossip Girl had been silent about her ever since the lingerie photo went out, and then on the most important day of her life, GG decided to go after her. WTF? Serena supposed that GG wasn’t as irrelevant as Lola thought. This caused Lola to get suspicious. Did S mention their previous conversation to anyone? Serena said she didn’t. And that’s when Lola thought of something. OMG. Could it be? Could Serena be Gossip Girl? Lola told Nate about her theory. Nate thought that was crazy, impossible, no way. But Lola told him she’d prove it. Once again, I say this: you go, girl!

Meanwhile, Nate let it slip to Diana that Chuck was on a mission to find a missing relative. This freaked the Brit out a bit. And then she got a text from me, the real Gossip Girl, saying that Serena was holding my site hostage. If Diana didn’t help get it back, then I’d expose the secret that made her scared of me in the first place. And that’s a promise.

Diana went to see Serena. It was nice to meet the infamous GG in the flesh. Or rather, the girl who’d been blogging as her recently. Diana informed Serena that she wanted her to keep her identity hidden as well as let Serena keep the site. This would protect Diana from being exposed of a secret or two. In return, Diana would make sure that Serena’s version of Gossip Girl was the most popular website in the world. I’d like to see you try!

As for Blair and Dan, they were preparing to come out as a couple at a Broadway show. But Dan wasn’t sure he wanted to melt into B’s world. Perhaps there was some sort of compromise? But what do you suppose? Enter Jenna Gribbon and Julian Tepper. Blair and Dan ran into the Brangelina of the five boroughs at lunch in Brooklyn. While Julian was all UES, Jenna was a Queens girl. They had made their relationship work even though they were from different worlds (fine, boroughs but might as well be worlds). In fact, every month they hosted a salon with interesting people, good food and witty conversation. Blair and Dan thought that sounded perfect. How utterly both of them! Hipster yet intellectual. So they began to prepare for their salon, which would now also be their coming out as a couple party. Perhaps it could be British themed. But who to invite? No Serena. No Nate. Yes, Jenna and Julian. And what about Diana Payne? British and the press. If she were to write about the party, their new world would be the hottest destination in NY! Everything’s coming up Dair!

However, Lola, who stopped by the Waldorfs to see Serena, overheard Blair and Dan discussing the party. As well as how it could be the perfect occasion for Dan to announce his second book. Hmm. Lola had an idea. She emailed Gossip Girl using Dorota’s phone (people, don’t leave your phones unattended!) and informed her that Lonely Boy would debut his Inside sequel at the salon tonight. Let’s see if Serena shows…

While Serena was looking for Diana to discuss this GG business, she ran into Nate. It was a tad awkward (you know, because he fired her and all), but they soon made up. Aw, friends! Nate told Serena he was having some problems with his new girlfriend. Ever since she became an “it girl”, she had been a tad MIA. Plus, Lola had this crazy idea that Serena was GG. Loose lips, Nate, geez. Serena was surprised and was all, “Me as GG? HAHA!” But secretly I think S was all, “Uh oh.”
Serena finally found Diana. She was on the phone so of course, Serena eavesdropped. She heard Diana telling the person on the other end of the line that she had made a deal with Serena and as long as she controlled GG, no one would ever find out about what she did for Chuck at the hospital. Whoa! Serena was so shocked that she went straight to the hospital and found a nurse who was working the night of the accident. She showed the nurse a picture of Diana. Was that woman there that night as well? The nurse said she was and it was Diana who had donated blood. OMG! Serena called Diana’s office, demanding to talk to her. But her assistant told her she was unavailable. However, she would be at the salon that night. I smell trouble!

All the while, Rufus was in Brooklyn and Lily was on the UES. Lily came to see her husband. She missed him, and the apartment didn’t feel like home without him. But the truth was Rufus thought he had perhaps lost part of himself when he entered Lily’s world. Lily suggested that the two of them sell the apartment so they could find a place that fit them both equally. She wanted their relationship to work no matter what. But then Lily received a call from the Soho Grande asking her to verify a credit card for the stay of a hotel guest. Who just so happened to be named Ivy Dickens. Wait, what? Turned out, Rufus had felt so bad about Ivy being kicked to the streets that he was putting her up at a hotel. Lily was livid. This girl was a thief. But Rufus thought otherwise. Ivy was a young girl with no family, no friends and no money. He was doing what was right. Lily disagreed, what Rufus was doing was wrong. He was supporting a criminal with her money. Ouch! Now Rufus knew how Lily really felt. And when Rufus went to use his debit card at a café, it was declined. OMG Lily cut him out. Yikes x a million!

At Blair and Dan’s salon, Lola was ready to unmask Serena as Gossip Girl. She had invited Nate (who in turn brought Chuck) and was going to prove her theory to him. And look, Serena was there. Lola knew that once Dan announced his second book, it’d be all over GG (since GG had broken news of his first book). Nate thought anyone at the party could send in that tip. Oh crap. He had a point. So Lola had a better idea.

Lola saw Diana and Serena go off to talk. She grabbed S’ phone (again, people. DO NOT LEAVE YOUR PHONES UNATTENDED) and hid to watch their interaction. Sure enough on S’ phone there was a live link to Gossip Girl. OHMYGOD! Lola began to film and it streamed right to the GG site. Serena asked Diana where she was the night of Chuck’s accident. Diana admitted she was in NY. Then S asked where she was the day Chuck was born. Diana knew what Serena was insinuating. And as everyone at the party started watching the video on Gossip Girl, Diana finally admitted the truth: She was Chuck’s mother. OMFG! Lola immediately stopped filming. Oh no! She never meant for shiz to get that real. But it was too late, now everyone knew the biggest secret ever.
Chuck was rightfully pissed at Diana. The woman had been in New York this whole time, banging his BFF, inviting him to parties, and she never told him the truth. WTF? Chuck couldn’t deal with this right now. Poor C

Lola could not believe she had been right about Serena being GG. But S told her it didn’t even matter. Lola caused serious damage. Sure, Lola felt bad for hurting Chuck, but she didn’t care about hurting Serena. S begged her not to tell anyone her enormous secret. And what do you know, when Lola apologized to Nate, she didn’t tell him that S was GG. Hmm, what are you waiting for, Lola?
Having gone to get ice, Blair and Dan missed all the drama. They were surprised to return to their party to find everyone leaving. Jenna and Julian told them that their party was more of a soap opera than a salon. Burn! The whole thing was a total fiasco. Dair had tried to create a new world and it sucked. What did that mean for their future?? Dan didn’t think their relationship was about choosing one world, it’s their world. Blair thought the night was one big worldwide disaster. Dan said they needed to face disasters together, as a team. Ugh, really liking these two. Hate myself.
Lola went to see Serena who was thankful her cousin didn’t tell Nate the truth about her acting as GG. But why exactly was that? Lola thought telling N about Serena being GG would hurt him. And well, she couldn’t ruin Chuck’s life and Nate’s in the same night. But what Lola didn’t understand was why Serena would want to be GG. Serena admitted she only started doing it recently. And right now, it’s all she’s got going for her. Bleak. Lola decided she had enough of the UES. She was officially resigning and going back to her life at Julliard. Lola even called her mom and told her she’d been right all along. The UES was noxious. She was done with the highlife and the van der Woodsens. See ya! And what would you know, Serena wrote on GG that the spotlight on Lola had officially dimmed. End scene.

Diana came to the Empire to see Nate and Chuck. She admitted the truth about it all. You see she had met Bart when he was still with Elizabeth. Diana was young, couldn’t resist him and so they had an affair. It ended when she got pregnant. Chuck didn’t understand why she gave him up to Elizabeth. Diana said she was a mess and unfit to raise a child, and Elizabeth couldn’t have a child. It all made sense. So Diana left town. A few years later, she wanted to see Chuck but Bart thought it’d be too confusing. Although now that she was in NY and Chuck knew the reality, maybe they could have a real relationship? Aw and weird.

However, a little later, Diana received a text from me. Her being Chuck’s mom wasn’t the secret I was talking about. Oh, no. There was something else. Something way bigger. But don’t fret, my pets. I’m sure that secret will come out soon enough. Just you wait.


                                                                           
                                                                                                                                          Xoxo Gossip Girl



PS: I don't own this comment/topic, if you would like to read more about gossip girl just check this page


http://gossipgirl-blog.cwtv.com



Thanks for reading my blog!! :)